Susan and the Hairy Man

by Adrienne Ray © 2006

"Noooo!!!!" the woman wailed. "You can't mean that you would hang a woman!!!"

She barely seemed a woman. Not quite 5 ft. tall, she looked even smaller sitting on the behemoth of a horse that she called Tony. She looked all the more vulnerable with a hangman's noose around her neck. The fact that she was wearing a lavender velvet dress and a silk ribbon in her hair made this scene seem completely incongruous.

It was April 3,1865, in a very war torn place called Pongo, Virginia. The confederate soldiers surrounding the woman did not seem to be functioning as a single unit. The Confederate Captain was cold and resolute. The sergeant and the other enlisted men were a great deal less enthusiastic.

"Eleanor Fountaine," Captain Randall intoned, "you have been found guilty of espionage against the Confederacy. For this heinous crime you shall be hanged by the neck until dead."

The woman sobbed uncontrollably. Sergeant Collins shuddered and said, "Captain, my men are loathe to participate in the hanging of a lady."

"Here that, Captain Randall?" the woman said. "They are 'loathe to participate in the hanging of a lady'!"

"Shut up, girl!" the Captain said. "This is no kind of a lady! This is not Eleanor Fountaine from Georgia! This is a little PICK- a-ninny from right around here! Her real name is Susan Harvey! She also goes by the names Maria Gonzales and Princess Little Flower. There is no such thing as Indian royalty, you deceiver!"

"How can you execute a pregnant woman? Ooooh!!!" She swooned and would have fallen off her horse but the soldier beside her caught her and pushed her back into place. She said, "Thank you, suh, You are more of a gentleman than the men that rank above you."

"Captain Randall, perhaps it would be more appropriate if we returned her to Richmond for trial." The sergeant tried.

"Don't let her fool you, Collins," the Captain cried, his voice cracking under the strain. "She has been captured more times than I care to count. The only way to be clear of her is to kill her. And she is NOT pregnant!"

"Beggin' your pardon, sir, but what puts you in the position to know that?" Collins asked. He had no expression on his face but he was clearly not pleased with his commanding officer.

"BECAUSE she is a liar!!! She isn't like a decent woman!" Randall cried.

"Oh my!!!" Susan moaned. "Insult before injury! What has happened to this great nation??!!!"

"She isn't even a white woman!" Randal argued. He pulled the silk ribbon from her hair. A mass of black curls fell to her shoulders. "Look!! Look!! She's as dark as a Portuguese!!"

"Captain Randall!!!" Collins yelled. This was, after all, Tidewater Virginia. It was bad enough they were preparing to hang a woman. No need to humiliate her also.

"She's a Melungeon!!!" Randall said. "Half Negro. Half Indian. Probably half gypsy too!"

"You're playing fast and loose with those halfs," Susan said. "Or didn't they teach you how to cipher in that Yankee school you attended?"

"I was educated in Oxford!!!" Randall said.

Susan looked knowingly at the soldiers around her.

"It's in England," Randall said.

"You're not from around here," Susan said, stating the obvious.

"Don't let her do this!" Randall said to the men.

"She's trying to undermine my command! She's trying to undermine the Confederacy! She thinks she's smarter than all of us! She's just a woman!"

"Please don't kill me, suh!!" Susan blubbered.

"Oh! Don't you dare do that, you little harlot!"

Randall growled. "We're going to kill you alright! And do you know who's going to help us? This monstrosity you call a horse!"

"You have no cause to bring mah horse into this," she sniffed.

"Yeah. Yeah. That's right. This horse you love so much. What do you say he is? His mare was your daddy's plough horse but his sire was an Arabian champion that wandered onto your farm? You probably stole him! And now, I am going to give the order and this horse is going to hang you!

Because he is too dumb to know any better and too much of an animal to even care!"

Susan drew a ragged breath and said, "I would like to bequeath mah horse, Tony, to General Robert E. Lee because, of all the men that have ridden Tony, General Lee treated him the best."

"You are such a liar! You don't even know General Lee!!" Randall yelled. "Do you know what I'm going to do with this horse after you're dead? I'm not giving him to Robert E. Lee. I'm not giving him back to your family. I'm going to shoot him and feed his meat to Yankee prisoners!"

There was an audible gasp coming from the enlisted men. Collins was looking at Captain Randall with great contempt.

"You really don't know anything about Virginians, do you Captain Randall?"

"Hang her!!" the Captain screamed.

"Wait!" Susan cried. "Before I die, it is only fair that you list the crimes against me!"

"No!" Randall said.

"Read the crimes," Collins said.

The two men glared at each other but in the end Randal ordered a corporal to read the crimes of the accused.

 

"Susan Harvey, also known as Eleanor Fountaine, Marie Rodrigus, Yolanda Williams, Princess Little Star and Alex Truman," the Corporal raised an eyebrow at the last name but continued, "has been found guilty of espionage and of stealing the Captain's horse.Of transporting stolen slaves across state lines. Of stealing General Johnson's horse-"

"See? It wasn't Robert E. Lee. You don't even know him-"

"I shot at him once-"

"- of murder. Of inciting the Cherokee to uprising-"

"That was self defense. And there aren't enough Cherokee left to be an uprising. What you saw was a mild disagreement-"

"-of stealing Mayor Williams' horse.." the corporal squinted his eyes as if he couldn't believe what he was reading. He pondered a bit. Then he said, "Of molesting a Confederate officer-"

"See? That's just wrong," Susan said. She turned to Randal and said, "All I did was make you take your clothes off-"

All eyes turned on Randal. "I needed your clothes. You were the only soldier that came anywhere close to my size. You have very small feet."

"Woman, for that indiscretion alone, you should be hung!"

"Oh p'shaw!" she said. "It wasn't an indiscretion! I think you have spent far too long in an English boarding school. You seem to be lacking qualities usually found in most Virginia men."

"Enough!!" Randall bellowed. "Hanging isn't enough!

You insolent little harpy! I will have you horse whipped!! Take that noose from her neck, soldier! I will have you
horsewhipped before you die!!"

"Captain Randall, with all due respect to your rank, I believe you have overstepped your boundaries," Sergeant Collins yelled. As the corporal removed the noose from her head, the sergeant and captain stood nose to nose, growling at each other like gutter dogs.

"Sir, obviously you have a history with this woman and I will not allow you to seduce my men into your web of sin! We will not hang a woman today!"

"Sergeant, I will charge you with insubordination! Maybe even treason! Perhaps more than one will hang today!"

"The Limey traitor is trying to hang Sergeant Collins!!!" Susan screamed.

It was amazing how fast the rifles became pointed at Captain Randal. With an ever so subtle nudge with her knees, Tony, who truly was a behemoth of a horse, crashed through the circle of horses. No soldier really wanted to hang a woman and quite a few were hopeful that they might have a chance to try Captain Randal for treason. Few, indeed, were the horses that could outrun Tony in the long haul but there were lighter horses that could catch him
in a short dash. The horses in this camp, however, knew just how much Tony did not like to be caught. He could deliver a mighty memorable back leg kick to any horse approaching him from behind. Neither horse nor rider was particularly interested in catching Susan Harvey. Soon she escaped them. She crashed through the bramble, heading for the deep woods. The paths she followed were little more than deer trails. There were boys in that army that could track her better than her own daddy could, but, maybe if she could put enough distance between her and the Confederacy, maybe they would move on to something else. There was a war going on. She traveled into the night, cursing the full moon that would make it all the easier for the soldiers to follow her. Perhaps it was because she cursed that moon which wished neither good nor ill for her or perhaps it was just her bad luck but she found him standing in the middle of the path. A dark creature slightly taller than she was. A creature with a flippant sneer and covered in thick black hair. Known and feared in the backwoods by all her kind.

The Hairy Man!

"How do, Susan Harvey," said he.

"How do, Mister Devil."

"Now is that any way to talk to me? After all I've done for you? You know what my name is."

"I hear tell your name is Legion."

He grimaced at  the common mistake she was making. He said with strained patience," No. When I said my name was legion, I meant I have many names. A legion of names. A large number of names."

Tony slowly backed away from him and the thing said quickly, "Do I hear riders coming? Is someone looking for you?"

"What all have you done for me, Hairy Man?" Susan said quickly. True, enough, she couldn't go back the way she came. "I don't see how you've helped me at all.

Because last time I looked, I been mostly living by my own wits. By the way, Thank you all to hell for this lovely war and such."

"Now you call me by my proper name. Your Daddy calls me Ahriman and knows me well."

"Uh huh."

"And I didn't cause this War of Aggression. It's been a long time coming. And as far as what I've done for you, who do you think gave you such a smart mouth? And who gave you the idea you could kill that Monroe Davis in a knife fight?"

"It was self defense."

"But you did it. You belong to me now. You took another's life."

"I didn't do anything wrong. Self defense is self defense. I'm going to ride pass, Mr. Devil, and don't you do anything ignorant like jump on my back and ride all the way to Richmond."

"Richmond burns," he said with a grin.

A lump came to her throat and she could not hide her emotion.

"What?" Ahriman laughed. "You have been fighting against the Confederacy. Are you upset that they've burned the capital?"

"I just want the war to end," she said hollowly. "I didn't think they'd burn it."

"What? You think if the war ends quickly you'll get one or both of your brothers back alive? Now- is it Shadrack fighting for the North and Anselm fighting for the South? Or is it the other way around?"

"Get out of my way!"

"Hold on, missy," Ahriman said. "Let me get my gunny sack handy. You know the saying, 'The Hairy Man puts you in his gunny sack, he'll take you to hell and never come back.' Now, you've taken a life and all that takes a life must come back to me."

"After you get something for your gunny sack, you go to hell then?"

"Sure and I got a gunny sack just your size."

"And never come back?"

"Not as far as you're concerned. No."

"Then take what took a life, you old goat!"

In the blind faith that his mistress had good sense, Tony charged the devil. She pulled the guilty knife from her bodice- the same knife that killed Monroe Davis- the same knife she'd used to cut the ropes that had tied her hands- and plunged it into the Hairy Man's chest. He smelled of sulfur and burnt feathers. It was the bravest thing she or Tony would ever do and who would ever believe her? Ahriman went down cussing. He started to shape shift into something much bigger. Tony had actually run over top of him and, as his mass began to increase, Tony planted a tremendous back foot kick into the demon's head.

They raced on into the moonlight. Susan had never been much for conjuring, but she muttered the words she'd heard the old women chant from her childhood.

"Father Oak, protect me!

Mother Willow, protect me!"

She heard the leaves rustling as she passed but they did little more than that. Either her conjuring was no good or the demon was stronger than any backwoods magic. Her mind raced back to older things. Things the old men talked about when they thought she wasn't listening- in a language they thought she didn't know-

"Soa Ann!"

The Hairy Man fell on his rear as if he had been hit. he howled but did not follow. Susan did not know if the thing she invoked was better or worse than the demon that followed her. It seemed she was always running from something but never to anything. Now Richmond burned. She did not know where she was until she stumbled into the clearing. She was at the homestead of a family friend. Andrew Phelps had always been kind to the people of color in this area. He was, of course, like every other able bodied young man around, enlisted in some regiment. This war was devastating this country. She led Tony into the house. These days it wasn't always wise to let your animals stay outside or even in the barn. She might have to leave quickly and she didn't know if the demon would return. It was hard to say who was more surprised: Andrew to see a horse come into his living room or Susan to see Andrew anywhere at all. Tony didn't really care.

"I thought you were off somewhere fighting," she said.

"I thought you wouldn't break into my house," he said, "at least, not with a horse."

He stood up from the table and walked over to the Franklin stove. She had wondered why he hadn't built a fire. Then she saw.

He could barely walk across the room. He'd been shot in the left leg. It didn't look good. Not only was he afraid of falling into a hot stove but Susan doubted he could maneuver well enough to carry wood inside or build a fire.

"What are you doing here, Andrew?"

"I couldn't keep up," Andrew said. "This is my house, so the company left me here."

"Captain Randal's company? Are you one of his men?"

"How does my military unit concern you?" Andrew asked suspiciously. "I've heard talk that you might be a spy of sorts..for which side?"

Susan put on her most hurt look and said, "I was wondering if you'd seen Anselm."

"No," he said. "I think Anselm's company has gone North."

She said nothing.

"I won't tell you anymore," he said. "The dress you're wearing..Where'd you get that from? Baltimore?"

So this is how it would be. Life would never be the same. The war would end, but they would never go back to the life before. She was a spy. He was a soldier. A soldier left behind...Why?

"They left you here to draw fire," she guessed, like one playing an unimportant parlor game. "You don't know where the Union army is. But if they come upon this house, you will make them burn you out and that may buy your company time to locate them and get away."

 

"I'm here because I'm wounded."

"They didn't leave you behind to get better. You'll die here. But if the Yankees find you, you'll take a few with you before you go."

"You're just a little girl. You don't understand these things."

"I understand that a lot of those boys with Randal are fifteen or younger. I understand that you think that will make Randall retreat from a fight so you want to buy him some time by dieing here-"

"No. That's not-"

"I understand that Randal believes the war is already lost and wants to go out in a blaze of glory. He wants the history books to remember 'Randal's Charge' or something like that and he doesn't mind taking a bunch of young boys with him."

"What?"

"And I know that Richmond is burning- which means the Yanks are on the move. You've got to go back to your men. Shoot Randal if you have to and move those kids away from here."

"How can you possibly know that?"

A terrible wind howled around the house. Trees exploded from the woods, smashing into the roof. The horse shuddered. A terrible voice screamed, "Susan Harvey! I have come to take you to hell!!!"

"What on earth is that?!!" Andrew cried.

"I dunno," Susan said.

A heavy pounding came upon the door as if a huge man was attacking it with a sledge hammer. The door did not give, so the thing ran around the house looking for an easier point of entry. Unearthly howls pierced the air as claws scraped against the windows.

"Any creature born of earth with the size and strength this one has would have easily broken down the door or come through the window,"  Andrew said.

 

"This beast is a conjuring thing."

"I don't know nothing about conjuring," Susan said, all wide eyed and innocent. "I'll be a Methodist 'til the day I die."

"It's in the wrong place then, isn't it?" Andrew said. He addressed the creature with a sense of indignant righteousness, "G'wan away from here, devil. I'm a church going Christian! You have no right to be here!"

"I come for what is mine!!" Ahriman shouted.

"I gave you what you had coming!" Susan shouted back.

"I tricked you fair and square! You're cheating!! He's cheating, Andrew!"

Andrew was looking at her like he'd like to throw her outside to the cheating demon. She'd tried to regain her innocent appearance but they were too familiar with each other for that to work now.

"I don't have any business with you, devil-"

"I just want the girl!!!"

"Suh! Do you insult my honor? Do you imply I would be cowardice enough to sacrifice a helpless woman in return for my own safety?? I am a Virginian!!" Andrew said, clearly offended by the proposal.  His fine feature squinted into an expression of utmost loathing as he added, "And clearly, you are not!!!"

"Oh! 'I'm a Virginian! I'm so wonderful! Honor means everything to me! And I'm going to destroy everything I hold dear in a war to protect my right to horse whip a few Negro slaves!' You people are so full of lies you even embarrass me!" Ahriman howled. "And what's this Christian drivel! I saw your momma dancing in the woods on a full moon! Don't deny it!"

"What?" Susan said.

"Enough of this!" Andrew said. He stumbled to the wood bin. He threw a few sticks of wood over his shoulder and produced a silver jewelry box. It was expertly crafted and looked like it might have been brought over from Europe when his ancestors first came to America. He dumped the contents out on the table and said, "This is my mother's jewelry box! Help me to the stove."

The house shook as a horrible wind whirled around it. Ahriman shrieked  and chanted words they didn't
understand. Sometimes he said things they could understand. Things like, "Son of a witch! I'll take your soul too!"

But the house held. The pictures fell off the wall, but the house remained strong. On one wall hung a cross stitch, meticulously done, that read, 'God bless this home'. It outraged Susan.

"Hey, Ahriman!! You can't blow down this house because it's blessed! Mrs. Phelps wasn't a witch!! You are such a LIAR!!!"

"She was!"

"She wasn't!"

"She was!!"

"I can't believe a thing you say! I bet you don't even know where hell is! You're probably just some Jack-o-lantern that hangs around the swamp and tells travelers to go the wrong way when they ask for directions!"

"I am not!!"

"Jack-o'-lantern! Jack-o-lantern! Jack-"

"Shut up!!" Andrew said. "Help me here!"

Susan was impressed with Andrew's ability to tear the stove pipe free from the wood stove. He was badly hurt but, aside from needing to lean on the cold stove for support, he worked as well as any man could. He let out a painful groan as he bent the stove pipe so that it fit neatly into the silver box.

Outside, the wind had stopped howling. Ahriman, sensing a plan was being born, was listening.

"Help me, Susan!" Andrew said. "Help me build a fire so he can't climb up on the roof and come down the chimney!"

"We don't have any kindling, Andrew!" she cried. "Oh no!!! This wood is too wet!"

They heard the Ahriman chuckle to himself as he scurried up the rose trellis. He slipped a little on the slate roof as his demon feet were not accustomed to the marvels of modern development. Slowly he made it to the chimney. The chimney was cold, of course, since Andrew had been too unsteady to risk a fire; so Susan's statement that they couldn't make a fire seemed plausible. They heard his laughter fade into the wind as something old an dirty rushed down the chimney into the stovepipe and then into the silver box..

Andrew slammed it shut and locked it.

They could hear him bouncing around in the box, cussing and calling them bad names. But he could not get out. Whether it was because the box was made of silver or if Andrew's much maligned mother protected them from the grave was of no concern to them. All they knew was they had trapped the Hairy Man.

"I want you to feel bad about this," Andrew said to Susan. "I have lost my mother's jewelry box because of you!"

Andrew carefully placed the jewelry box on the table and sat down stiffly. He looked extremely pale but he did not comment n his condition. Susan realized he was not far from fainting.

"Look here," Susan said in what she hoped was a cheerful tone. "Why don't you lie down and I'll get this stove working."

He let her help him into the bedroom and collapsed on the bed. He was probably unconscious when she undressed him. What was the war doing to her that she wasn't the least bit embarrassed by this? The banging that she did to fix the stove did not wake him. Ahriman was now silent, probably hoping they would be dumb enough to forget he was in there. Susan hid the jewelry under the wood in the wood bin. In these times it was important to always keep your treasures hidden. She was sitting in front of the stove with a cup of tea when she decided she would stay with Andrew until he either died or got better. She owed him that much.

The sound of horses approached the house. She crept to the window to see who it might be when the door burst open. This evil was born of earth and could get through the locked door. Captain Randal grabbed her by the neck and proceeded to choke her. Two other soldiers followed him in and attempted to pry his fingers off her.

"Captain Randal," she gasped, "if I might (cough) have a word with you in private-"

"In private??" he screamed, "in private??? There isn't any need for privacy! I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!!! I don't care if I lose my commission!! This army doesn't count anyway! Not the way things are going now!!!"

"It matters to us, Captain Randal," the Sergeant Collins said. "I sure would hate to lose respect for my commanding officer. Mistakes can happen. Ask Jeb Stuart."

"It's not me it's HER!!" Captain Randal whined.

"You don't know what she is!!! You don't know!!"

"It's a matter of importance to your career," she said. "Which seems in dire need of a boost, I think" Captain Randal relaxed his grip. Susan cleared her throat and found her voice.

"Would you gentlemen please check on Lieutenant Phelps? He is sleeping in the next room," she said. She waited until the two soldiers left. Then she whispered to Captain Randal, "How could you leave Lieutenant Phelps here alone? Without a nurse, he will surely die!"

"The fortunes of war," Randal said.

"Well, I have a fortune for you," she said. She offered him the silver box. "I guess you didn't know Andrew Phelps' mother was French Royalty."

"He never mentioned that."

"Everybody around here knows that," she said. "Of course, you wouldn't know that. You were in England." She ran her hands seductively over the mother of pearl inlay on the box. She said, "Inside this box is the lost crown jewels of the Duke of Alsace Lorraine. They fled to America after the French Revolution and have been hiding here ever since."

"Why would  French Royalty still be hiding? The Revolution is over."

"Because his mama wasn't the Duke of Alsace Lorraine, stupid! She stole the crown, along with other jewels and used the money to get the family out of France."

"Liar!"

"Fine. All I want is for you to leave me here to help Andrew. Something like this could get you back on your feet after the Yankees take over. Might give a soldier a future worth living for."

"Open it. I want to see."

"I can't open it. Andrew locked it and I don't have the key."

"Then how do you know the jewels are in there?"

"Andrew told me so," she said. She looked deep into his eyes and with the utmost sincerity added, "I may be the worst kind of liar but surely you know Andrew Phelps to be an honest man. I would keep the treasure for myself but, well, you have me in a desperate situation, don't you?"

He nodded and took the box from her hands.

"I wouldn't let anyone see that," she said.

"Andrew's men will recognize that box. They'll want you to give it back to his family. If you leave me here to take care of Andrew, well everyone'll think a lieing thieving pickanninny such as myself stole the box. Don't you think? And you'll be able to start over when this war is done."

Randal thought about this carefully. Then he slowly placed the silver box under his coat. He called to his men.

"Lieutenant Phelps is unconscious," the sergeant said.

"He needs a doctor!"

"Then we are fortunate in that it appears Miss Harvey is an accomplished nurse," Randal said. "Due to these extenuating circumstance I feel we must leave this woman to administer care to our fallen comrade."

This turn of events surprised the soldiers but they accepted it. They weren't to eager to bring Susan Harvey back to the gallows anyway.

"Take care of him, ma'am," the sergeant said. "He's a good man."

"I will," Susan said. "And you boys be careful. Richmond is burning."

They didn't know what to do with this information. Captain Randal pushed them out the door. He was anxious to leave because Andrew could die any minute and there would be no excuse to trade Susan's freedom for the treasure. In minutes they were gone and the house was quiet again. Susan pushed a chair up against the broken door and hoped that would keep any unwanted visitors out. And the war raged on because no one could stop it.

 

THE END

 

HOME