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myStatus

© Eric W. Knight

I just popped in to check myStatus , and immediately a zombie blocked my path. He was a sticky type, and I wanted to avoid entanglements, so I decided to take the longer route through the underworld. After all, the daemons keep the undesirables cleaned off the streets there.

It grew darker as I traveled toward the underworld, and I wasn't alone. The path to the underworld was crowded with others like me who couldn't reach their destinations the normal way. As we moved along, I could hear the nearby sounds of werewolves and other evil things that would leave us deformed and corrupted if they touched us.

We arrived at the gates of the underworld to find the great dragon daemon, guardian of the gates of the underworld, successfully holding us all at bay. He wasn't making a distinction between those of us with legitimate tasks and strays, so we took matters into our own hands. When we had enough of us to keep him confused, we all rushed at him in a mass. He did his best to hold us back, but he was overwhelmed. Most of got through, and those who didn't went back to wait for their next chance.

Inside the underworld the streets were lit up like mid day. The sides of the streets were lined with tempting entertainment and diversions where the unwary were often lost for an eternity. It served to filter out some of the masses around me, but not enough. The going was slow on the streets of the underworld.

Suddenly the daemon servants of the underworld rose up and began capturing strays and dragging them down to the endless reaches. That cleared up the roads, but then they started trying to capture and interrogate the rest of us. I didn't want to be held for an eternity by an overzealous daemon, so I quickly retreated back through the gates of the underworld. I could hear the great dragon laughing at me as I ran back to my original route.

The daemons had been busy. This time the route was clear, but somewhere there was probably a daemon inextricably stuck to a zombie.

On my way I was assaulted by verbal trash from one of the local trolls. I ignored his trashy opinions, but I really wished he would just crawl back under his bridge and stay there.

Things began to clear up as I got closer to the status portal. I was in agent territory now, and I stay out of their way, because they're serious about watching out for their clients. One of them came after me when I tried to pass his client. I didn't want to be held and interrogated for an eternity, so I jumped off the path to get away from him. I know that's a good way to end up lost and running forever, but I did get around him and his client.

Back on the path I ran into more agents. They were arguing and jostling each other for positions on the path for their clients. When they saw me they all rushed toward me as if I was a threat. I hastily retreated right into the middle of their clients, and suddenly there was chaos. The path was filled with agents fighting with agents, and clients just trying to get out of the way. I used the pandemonium to escape and run down to the status portal.

I tried to present my identification and password twice and failed both times. I must have been stressed from my encounter with the agents. So, on my third try I was really nervous, because if I missed that one I would be stuck there for a long time before I would be allowed to try again.

Seeing my predicament, a benevolent angel came down to help me through my last try. The angel calmly talked me through the process, and this time it worked.

I watched myStatus rise to the heavens, and I popped out to read it. It was waiting for me when I arrived.

Oh darn! Still running!